Hall of Shame Moment: Vanilla Ice, Hypocritical Psychopath

Erik is showing so much compassion and even Traci is trying to be genuinely helpful, telling him he needs to be able to laugh at himself and not let the past haunt him. Erik even goes so far as to salve his ego by telling him he was a true original who didn’t get the credit he deserves and it isn’t his fault people used him to make money. A lot of blather about how Vanilla should not let his worth be determined by others. I wish they would both stop catering to this tunnel-visioned, self-absorbed narcissist. Every comment made to him to show that as hurt as he’s been he did the same thing to Gary is turned around by Vanilla to be all about his pain. There wasn’t even the slightest indication he could see past himself and his colossal issues. He whines some more of how damaged he was to be parodied by Jim Carrey. Did Jim Carrey ever pick him up and carry him around a restaurant, threatening to deep fry him?

No, he didn’t. Wouldn’t that be cool, though? But I digress…

Not content to let the matter drop, he continues to beat the dead horse that is Gary Coleman’s cheese factor and drags others into the mix for good measure; he would have refused to do this show had Hammer been on this season. He says that Hammer is his friend and he likes him but he is cheese and so Vanilla couldn’t allow himself to be in the house with him. We learn here that Danny Bonaduce was in talks to do this show and no, Vanilla wouldn’t be in the house with him either because he would “kick his fat punk ass” since Danny has said bad things about him in the past. [Editor’s Note: Considering that Danny Bonaduce has been in several celebrity boxing matches and won, unlike Ice, who lost to Todd Bridges, you have to wonder just who would have done the ass-kicking.] I think the reason he wouldn’t have done this show with those two is that neither one of them would listen to this crap for more than about three seconds before verbally smacking him through the floor. But didn’t the editing lead us to believe none of them knew in advance with whom they would be sharing a house? He had no idea who would be there and was lucky he landed into this coven of peacemakers. Where are Vince Neil or Jerri Manthey when you need them?

So to recap: He is humiliated about being reminded of his past and feels it’s incredibly wrong of anyone to do so, yet feels zero compunction about doing it to Gary Coleman. He is enraged by strange woman rejecting his brownies since by his logic she lives in L.A. and how dare she not have time for celebrities. So therefore she willingly chose her situation and should deal with every aspect. Yet the life-choices he has made have gotten him into the situation he is in yet he shouldn’t have to deal with it and rather it is the world which should adapt to him. Danny Bonaduce has said bad things about Vanilla in public and should be beaten. He’s said bad things about Danny and his alleged friend Hammer with again, zero compunction. The hypocrisy is staggering.

Reality Check: Find some way to amass enough fame and wealth so you can insulate yourself from the entire world. If that proves difficult then try therapy. Yes, more therapy. Lots and lots of therapy. In the meantime, the next time someone offers you a chance to be on television, just say no. About these reality checks… cash them.

I know there will be those of you out there who think he’s just playing a part, this is all just his shtick. After all, Traci Bingham just went on Ryan Seacrest’s new talk show saying that she was told to play the part of the bitch and it’s a credit to her talent that no one knew she was acting when she got her Hall of Shame Moment. (Even if that was true, which I don’t believe for a second, the utter stupidity of being so unpleasant under the guise of your own identity… there are just no words. Also, it should be noted that somebody did believe she was acting – Erik accused her of being a plant by the producers to stir things up.) But for those of you who think that Vanilla was just playing a part here, hit a search engine and check out articles on his behavior during MTV’s 50 Lamest Videos. That was a show hosted by Janeane Garafalo, Chris Kattan, Denis Leary, and Jon Stewart where the top 50 worst videos ever made were played and mocked, and the top 10 destroyed never to be played on MTV again. Vanilla was invited on to destroy his own video. He took a baseball bat to it and then proceeded to take said bat to the rest of the stage. Among other things, he destroyed a table, swung and hit a mannequin of Debbie Gibson right between the eyes, and in the mayhem Chris was hit with some of the fallout injuring his foot while Janeane was curled up covering her head in a protective maneuver. He wasn’t kidding then either and Chris’ cries of “Nooooooo – Vanilla – NOOOOOO” ring in my ears as I watch The Surreal Life. For those of you who are still don’t believe that this guy is off, check out The Smoking Gun in regards to his arrest, January 5, 2001. He was charged with domestic violence for allegedly pulling his wife’s hair out of her head as she tried to jump out of the moving car in which they were having an argument. His two young children were in the vehicle at the time. He pled out to disorderly conduct and was sentenced to probation and ordered into family therapy. Do you think that was just his shtick, too?

I’d like to submit a dishonorable Hall Of Shame mention to the powers that be for ever casting this guy in the first place. If only Suge Knight were here.

Before Jamie discovered the joys of writing about reality TV, she interviewed musicians for the website she co-owns, AceFrehleyOnline.com. She can be reached with comments or job offers at j.goralski@sbcglobal.net.

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